Mental strength isn’t often reflected in what you do.

It’s usually seen in what you don’t do.

Author Amy Morin writes in her book, “13 Things Mentally Strong People Don’t Do,” that developing mental strength is a “three-pronged approach.”

It’s about controlling your thoughts, behaviors, and emotions. Mentally strong people have healthy habits. They exercise self control in their reactions to situations.

I saw a friend, John Gorman, post this topic on facebook today and felt it was worthy of sharing on the blog and elaborating the thoughts myself.

1. They don’t give up after the first failure

Instead, they bounce back after failure to become STRONGER. Those who are mentally strong don’t consider lessons learned as losses. They evaluate the situation and improve. Don’t waste time feeling sorry for yourself. Learn and improve. If you’re not making mistakes, you’re not doing enough!

2. They don’t give away their power.

You are in control. You make your own choices. There is power in owning your choices. Don’t allow other’s opinions or actions impact how you feel about yourself. Only you can control your own mind.

3. They don’t shy away from change. 

Instead, they embrace it. They understand that in order to grow changes have to occur. 

4. They don’t focus on things they can’t control.

Don’t be a victim. Instead, focus on what you can do in each situation. 

5. They don’t worry about pleasing everyone.

Instead, they are able to say NO. They create priorities and stick to them. News flash: You Can’t Do It All!

6. They don’t fear taking calculated risks.

Instead, they spend time preparing for what’s ahead by weighing out the risks/benefits before taking action.

They don’t waste time feeling sorry for themselves.

Instead, they express gratitude. Don’t dwell on the past. Reflect on it and learn from it. 

8. They don’t make the same mistakes over and over.

Instead, they accept responsibility and change their behavior. 

9. They don’t resent other people’s success.

They celebrate other people’s success.

10. They don’t refuse constructive criticism

Instead, they welcome the reviews and aim to improve.

11. They don’t fear alone time

Instead, they make time for solitude. Morin writes. Becoming mentally strong “requires you to take time out from the busyness of daily life to focus on growth.”

Here are some of the benefits of solitude Morin lists in her book:

  • Solitude at the office can increase productivity.
  • Alone time may increase your empathy.
  • Spending time alone sparks creativity.
  • Solitary skills are good for mental health.
  • Solitude offers restoration.


12. They don’t feel the world owes them anything.

Morin writes, comparing yourself to others will only set you up for disappointment if you don’t receive what you think you’re owed. Entitlement is a huge problem in society these days. Those who are mentally strong stay focused on their efforts and not on what they believe they are owed.

13. They don’t expect immediate results. 

Instead, they take small steps toward the goal. “A willingness to develop realistic expectations and an understanding that success doesn’t happen overnight is necessary if you want to reach your full potential,” Morin writes.

Mentally weak people are often impatient. They overestimate their abilities and underestimate how long change takes, she says, so they expect immediate results.

Think About It

Do any of these resonate with you? Do you find yourself practicing these things?

If you find that some of these are a struggle for you we will be focusing on many of these topics in our next Group Coaching Program called The Transformation Blueprint that opens for enrollment on April 15th. You can check it out here!

If you have some strong mental fortitude I’d love to hear about what practices you use to stay mentally strong!!